Sunday, December 9, 2007

I'm not bad; I'm good

By Mr. Bogdan
Morning Scratch editor

I've been told by The Investor I will get only coal for Christmas if I "keep up this attitude." She says Santa Paws isn't very happy with me. She says that I haven't even tried to improve my behavior even as Christmas nears.
"Lookit this face! This is the face of an angel."

The Investor's examples of recent badness on my part include:
(1) Hitting the Investor on the lips just this week and drawing blood;
(2) Hitting the Investor's friend in the face and drawing blood on her forehead;
(3) Hitting Sara in the face just this morning;
(4) Eating Christmas tree needles and throwing up all over the floor;
(5) Growling at the Investor last night when she picked me up;
(6) Trying to eat our doggy friends' Christmas presents last night while the Investor was trying to wrap the gifts;
(7) Getting on the kitchen counter and munching on the tomatoes;
(8) WAIT, INVESTOR. This is enough. I think this is unfair.

What about all the good things I do? I hardly ever hit the Man. I sit on the Man's and the Investor's laps. I purr and make the Investor happy about it. I let Sara give me a bath - SOMETIMES.
Sometimes I eat things I shouldn't ... but what's important is that I eat things I should, like crunchies. And I can't help that I misunderstood, when the Investor put treats on the floor that weren't for me. I think it's perfectly reasonable to have believed those doggy treats were for me. Why else would they be on the floor?

The Bogdan verdict: I'm a good kitty. All these "bad" things are just misunderstandings.

Here are the girls getting Christmas ready:
Kat 3: "Hey, Sara. You should come down here. These hanging toys are great!"


DK & The Fluffies said...

Um, sounds like you are just being a cat... you should get some serious goodies from Santy Paws after all that Horror House stuff this year!

Parker said...

I'll bet Santa still brings gifts to you! But try not to draw blood, beans really don't like that!

Artsy Catsy said...

Bogdan, remember the fine art of the excuse: Back in the olden days, humans would have their blood drawn to cure disease ... just tell Santa Paws you keeping your humans healthy for the holidays. And those growls were just ho-ho-ho's. And eating the pine needles, tomatoes, etc. ... you were cleaning house, of course!


archi ann said...

hmmmm ... i grunt and charge at my mum all the time and i've bit her really bad a couple times but it's just cuz i don't like the doggie smell when she plays with me after petting the neighbor doggies. and i'm still getting stuff for Christmas so I think you are just misunderstood. i'll put in a good word for you with Santa Homer under the tree - Homer would understand!

Zippy, Sadie and Speedy said...

Hah, if yoor mom thinks dat's bad behavior she shood take us on fur a week! Zippy bit mom dis morning and left a huge gash in her leg-she's still gonna get prezents, Sadie pushes da tree off da table everyday now so she can look out da window-she's getting prezents, I have pooped, so far, on mom's bed (2times), da gest room pillow, da carpet (3times), and I have barfed all over da laundry room (about 4piles) and I'm still getting prezents. So, yoor behavior is that of an angel compared to us. Yoo should get prezents!

Skeeter And LC said...

We're not sure. We think if we did those things we might not efen get the coal to play wif. But like we said we're not sure; Beins are kinna forgivin. Jus not gonna take the chance, ya know?

Dragonheart said...

I agree Bogdan, you've been good, and Santa Claws should bring you some nice gifts. Eating tree needles doesn't sound very good. I think I'm glad we have a fake tree!

Daisy said...

You made BLOODS come out? Very impressive.

Rosie & Cheeto said...

hahaha, yes all just misundurstandings...not bad behavyor. Yer a writer and a spinstur-so kul!!